so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
