we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
