So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize