sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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