That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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