It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
