She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
