So drunk, too bad you don't want this
wat bout pragnant strippers??
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
