At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
