I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
