would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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