Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
