Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
