i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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