I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
