Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
