He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
