That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
