Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
