Did you just see the Batmobile???
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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