so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
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