i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
You took a bar mat shot.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
