: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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