it wasn't lemon gatorade
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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