He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
