you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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