Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
