Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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