did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I showed him my bush... on skype.
My balls are so social today.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
