I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
