so explain again why im purple
no
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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