he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
