like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it glows. i had to have it.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize