break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize