no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
