I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
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Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
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We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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