He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
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He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
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Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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