We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
