i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
