miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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