Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Randomize
