my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
