You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
