Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
