She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
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