walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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