All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize