my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.