we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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