I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
